So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Randomize