so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
