i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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