Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
