Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
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