i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
