am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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