Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Randomize
