now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Randomize