Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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