i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
My ATM looks so different sober.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Floor bacon is actually really good
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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