They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize