I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
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