Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
