I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
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I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Is it penis luge time yet?
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
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He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.