You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
