You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
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I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
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I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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