Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
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