matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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