tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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