i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
there was a trapeze. enough said
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
