So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
