Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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