my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
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I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
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Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
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