What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
