May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize