the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
