That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Randomize
