I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
