Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize