morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
