Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
