I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
i think im in europe. pls send help
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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