Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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