I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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