I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.