just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
