I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize