Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Randomize
