I am in a vortex of obligation.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
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