i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
i am craving dick and cupcakes
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