I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
