can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
