You just made me feel so damn special
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
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so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
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I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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