well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
