i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Randomize