gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
