Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Randomize