He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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