We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole